Mindful Meals

Being present with your friends and families during meal times

Being present and fully engaged in our relationships takes effort. So, if you’re looking for an area of your life where you can easily start practicing this concept, look no further than mealtime!

We live in a world filled with distractions from the latest show we want to binge to busy schedules and all the “I need to _________” tasks filling our minds. It’s easy to let your mind and heart get sidetracked from what’s most important, so we have to make a conscious choice to “show up” with those we love when we sit down at the table together. Here are a few tips designed to help you be more present, engaged and mindful when you share a meal with friends or family members.

1. Plan ahead. We all have good intentions to show up and be fully engaged in our relationships and conversations, but those intentions will fail if you don’t have a plan to make them a reality. Step 1 to more mindful meals and being present with your friends and family during mealtime? Schedule at least one meal a week (and we’d love for there to be more) where you sit at the table together and enjoy a meal. With school starting back and practices, meetings and other responsibilities pulling at your time, you may need to “float” that meal from week to week depending on your family’s schedule. For others, it may be easier to set a standing date for Taco Tuesday dinners or Sunday night suppers. Whatever works for you, your family and your friends, schedule it so that it happens!
   

2. Cook the meal together. Yes, we understand life is busy, but a good way to create a meal where everyone is engaged and focused is to prepare it together. That might mean involving your family in simple tasks, like setting the table or pouring drinks, to preparing a side or making dessert. If you regularly schedule meals with friends, invite them into the preparation, too, by asking them to bring sides or other items.
   

3. Turn off distractions. Eat at the couch while watching your favorite show or catching up on the news? Guilty. We’ve already suggested moving your meal off the couch to around the table, so now it’s time to turn off all the things that distract you from fully focusing on the people you’re sharing a meal with. Turn off the TV. Put your phone on silent or put it away entirely. You may need to put your phone or other devices on the “Do Not Disturb” setting so that you aren’t receiving notifications that pull your attention away from your family or guests.
   

4. Make the meal special. When your schedule is busy, meals can sometimes become just another thing to check off the list. For busy parents running from practice to errands to games, meals are often quickly eaten in the car. If you want to be more present and mindful at meal times, make those meal times special. Set the table (as simply or elaborately as you’d like), light candles, plan out the meal and the dishes you’ll serve, from family favorites to new recipes. You don’t have to serve a three-course meal or make gourmet fare, but serve up a meal and sides that your family or friends enjoy. Then, sit at the table with them and enjoy it together.
   

5. Ask questions. Being fully engaged and present with your friends and family during a meal means actually talking and listening to them. For some families and friend groups, conversation comes easy. But if it doesn’t or if you often find your conversation feeling a little superficial or surface level, it might be good to think of a few open-ended questions you can ask other than “How was your day?”. If you’re eating with kids and you know about assignments or projects they worked on at school during the week, ask what they learned. If you’re eating with a friend you haven’t seen in a while, ask about his or her work, hobbies or interests. But don’t make the meal an interview! Listen and truly seek to engage with what your family members and friends are saying so that this meal becomes a time to reconnect, recharge and feel cherished and cared for.

How do you strive to be fully present and engaged with your friends and family members during meals? Share your tips in the comments!