Maybe stilettos would help?

I’m not tall.

Actually, I’m rather on the short side. Like the kind of person people sometimes describe as petite. I’m five foot two or three, sometimes taller in certain shoes. (And a WHOLE lot taller in the shoes Alisha and Mindy picked out for me to try on last Saturday. I was a lumbering GIANT in those heels. Too bad they were bronze, kind of ugly, and had pointy toes like elf shoes.)

Being short has its advantages. Random people in stores sometimes offer to get things down off of high shelves for you (after seeing the climbing and/or jumping up and down) and you get to revel in the fact that courtesy does still exist. It’s cool when you’re short and someone bigger than you hugs you, because you feel enveloped and safe. You don’t have to worry if your heels are too tall because really, what’s too tall?

Being short also has its disadvantages. There’s that whole not-being-able-to-reach stuff thing. There’s the hassle of finding pants that you don’t have to hem (or get hemmed in my case). When you’re short and have little feet, there’s a shoe issue. The tall people (or people with big hair) seem to have radar for short people and ALWAYS sit in front of them at shows and movies. There are things you want to do that become a big production because you’re short.

Especially things around the house. For whatever reason, my cabinents are pretty tall and contain three shelves in each one. I cannot reach the top shelf. So everytime I have to get something from up there, I have to pull a chair over to the counter and perch precariously on my toes to get what I need. It’s fun.

But the thing that happened last night is my least favorite. The light bulbs in the ceiling fixture in my bathroom suddenly died last night. (OK, suddenly isn’t the best word. The true story is that one light bulb burnt out about a week ago and I did nothing. Last night the other one went.) There are two light fixtures in my bathroom: one over the vanity and one over the toilet/shower area. It’s this light that burnt out. Now the ceiling isn’t all that high, but it’s high enough that I have drag out a ladder, then haul it upstairs to change these bulbs. Plus, there’s the unscrewing the fixture, which I’m then always scared I’ll drop and replacing the bulbs, which I have dropped and when glass hits ceramic tile, it ain’t pretty. So that was fun to clean up!

This morning, I was forced to take a shower in the dark. Just think on that. So, this afternoon, I have to go find some light bulbs, drag out the ladder, and replace the bulbs.

So, does anyone want a job as caretaker of my house? I could, um, pay you in baked goods.

Yeah, I didn’t think so. Sigh. I guess it’s up to me.