I just don’t get it

So it’s been a crazy Saturday. I left Nashville around 11:20 a.m. to meet my mom at a Cracker Barrel off of Interstate 24 somewhere in Kentucky for lunch and the great Muffin trade-off. (Muffin the Wonder Poodle is staying with my parents while I’m in New Mexico next week. Mom was going to come stay at my house, but that didn’t happen. Incidentally, my house is lonely and quiet.) Anyway, Mom and I had lunch, then I relinquished custody of the puppy, and we went our separate ways.

When I arrived back in Nashville, I went straight to Mindy’s, since I’d called her earlier to see if she’d like to go to the outlet stores in Lebanon (which we’ve decided to pronounce Le-ban-nin, cause it’s just more fun). I felt the need to check out the Ann Taylor outlet because I love Ann Taylor but can’t usually afford. So we made the trip on I-40 out to Lebanon and were non-plussed by our findings at the outlet mall. Cute stuff at Ann Taylor, but really not much cheaper than the regular store. The color scheme they had going on at the Gap was frightening. (And led Mindy to declare, “I just don’t get it.”) It was all stripes and loud yellows and oranges that don’t really look good with any skin tone. We even checked out Maurice’s, but found nothing we wanted to spend actually money on.

So we left and decided to go eat at this little sports bar place we’d tried before and enjoyed yummy burgers and fried pickles. So we drive to it and discover it’s closed. Not just for the day, but FOREVER. So then, we decide to go on a search for a great hole-in-the wall to eat at. And drive through all of Lebanon, including the “historic downtown.” Eventually, we had to turn around and head back out to the interstate, heading for the Ruby Tuesday in Mt. Juliet, cause we wanted those little burgers. I actually almost ran a red light with a cop behind me (cool!), and we had to drive through a terrific thunderstorm, but we made it to Ruby Tuesday and ordered our burgers from our random, spaced out waiter. We also got salads. This is important. Remember that fact for later.

We’re eating salad and enjoying it and then the burgers arrive. Yummy and cute! But none of our burgers, especially Mindy’s, are really cooked all the way through. Not just a little pink, we’re talking red and we won’t discuss what happened when Mindy squished her’s. So we tell the waiter who tells the manager who brings us MORE burgers and MORE fries. We’re actually pretty much full, but feel we have to eat at least some of this food because we sort of asked for it.

Meanwhile, or at least while the manager is getting us more food, I’m still munching on my salad. In which I have some spinach leaves, romaine, and various other kinds of lettuce. And apparently, a root with spinach leaves attached. It just seemed to top off the meal that was a bit weird from the beginning. A fun day, but just full of moments in which we had to exclaim “I just don’t get it!”

(And then there was Friday night at Cafe Coco and that guy who brought his hookah with him. And that girl who randomly and passionately—and not well—sang to her date. With jazz hands.)