What not to say

So, yesterday, Mindy sent me this.

Well, she actually sent me an mp3 of Dimitri’s messages, but I can’t embed those into my blog posts without purchasing an upgrade.

But you guys—YOU GUYS!—Dimitri’s message (whether true or not) is hilarious and awful and disturbing ALL at the same time!

To summarize, what has happened is that some girl who is out with her friends gets hit on by this guy. To make her exit, she gives him her card. Which turned out to be a bad move, but totally something I would do. I’m sure she felt awkward and wanted away from the awkward and it seemed like a good idea at the time. Not so much. If you listened to the link above, you heard the messages he supposedly left on said girl’s phone.

Favorite phrases: “I am giving you an opportunity.” “I am setting a three o’clock deadline. I am erasing your number right now. If you don’t call me by then, then you have lost your chance.” “Most men in this city have something wrong with them. I’m one of the few who don’t.”

I truly, truly hope these are not real phone messages, because if so, this guy is SCARY!

And seriously, this is just NOT the way to get a date. Not at all. Not even a little.