Dispatches (from the dog)

Hey, guys! Muffin here.

And for the record, I take issue with that title. I am not a common dog. Whatever. I ask Mandy to type for me and look what she does. I thought I had her trained better than that!

But anyway, it’s my turn to write on the blog and I’m milking it for every chance I’ve got. But Mandy did say I had to do “Dispatches,” so I will stay true to that.

• It flooded in Nashville! Did you people know that? Of course, I only know because of all the news coverage I watch, because really, my world revolves around my house, my food bowl, and whoever walks by my house so I can bark at them. That’s just me saying hello! I don’t know why they act so weird about it and my person gets that crazy look in her eye and tells me to stop barking. People are weird. Anyway, it flooded. And it was bad. I’m not a fan of storms and Saturday and Sunday were about my least favorite days ever. During all the yuckiness, I decided my best course of action was to be really sweet and stick as close to Mandy as possible. She always protects me.

• My person keeps telling me I need a bath, but then she says we’re trying to conserve water and I can’t have one just yet. I’m telling you, this whole water conservation thing is genius. I don’t want to take a bath! So, guys, when the water conservation thing is over, don’t tell Mandy. Let’s just keep it our little secret.

• Mandy has been to the store every day this week. I think she’s losing her mind, guys. Or at least needs to learn about this thing called lists. She went on Monday for bottled water, milk, and eggs and came home with all kinds of delightful things that she won’t share with me because she says my doctor said I couldn’t eat “people food.” I hate my doctor. And Mandy. And I’m not a DOG! Anyway, on Tuesday she went for something else. On Wednesday she —WAIT, she actually didn’t go to the store on Wednesday. On Thursday she had to pick up prescriptions and get some stuff to donate to a church that’s helping flood victims. And she forgot to buy garbage bags while she was there. Since she’s on the last one and a friend told her about dry shampoo, she’ll be going to the store tonight again, I think.

Oh, well, that’s about all I’ve got for today. It really is my nap time and we all know how I get when I don’t get my beauty sleep. Only 7 more hours until Mandy comes home. . . and serves me dinner. Yum Yum!

I’m off for a nap. Enjoy your Friday!